08-03-2015

Getting through the dog days of summer

I call a friend, knowing she’ll understand the desperation in my voice.
The words teetering between a whine and a beg.
“Remind me again, how many more days before school starts?”

Loads of laundry piled up high, dishes accumulating far too quickly, and I’m not really sure the last time my bathroom was cleaned. And if I can be brutally honest…there is mold & scum clearly visible on the shower door.

It reminds me of a bachelor’s house but no, it’s just what summertime accomplishes in this house of mine. Summer will wreck havoc on the most organized of women. So consider what home looks like for me, one of the least organized women!

There is chaos and mayhem in piles of dirty dishes, produce that all needs canned at once, kids insisting they have to help make dinner which translates into even more messes. And don’t get me started on the Legos scattered endlessly over surfaces that are still sticky from yesterdays glued on art project.

On June 1^st those messes looked SO cute.
By August 1^st that same mess sends me into tirades, screams, and frustrated sighs.

So how do we make it through this chaotic mess that intrudes so unapologetically into our lives?

Perhaps I need to change my perspective so I can find beauty in this mess.
Find joy in the most unexpected places.

For along with the chaos and mayhem, there IS beauty that abounds if I stop myself from yelling and choose gratitude instead of frustration.

Beauty is everywhere, if I simply change my attitude.

Beauty can be found… in pajama laden breakfast of homemade Belgium waffles …as the exciting urge to can tomatoes kicks into high gear …in the joy found as my daughter insists to spend time with me, helping peel shrimp for dinner.

And those Legos, that art project that leaves sticky residue all over the kitchen table…doesn’t God want me to see the beauty in the creativity that my children create?

Perhaps we need to lower our expectations of what we think life should look like and remind ourselves of what really matters.

Summertime {and life for that matter} isn’t supposed to be neat and pretty and organized.

Your house shouldn’t look perfect.
It should look like children live there.

And living means making messes with markers, stickers, and popsicles.

Don’t we have the most fun when there is dirt under our nails, berry juice running down our faces {and ending on our shirts}, and sand stuck to our heels?

So close out of pinterest, with its’ unattainable ethereal perfection, and bring on these last days of summer.

Let’s find beauty in spontaneous trips to the park, even though that means leaving the house a mess.

Let’s experience joy running through a field of clovers, not worrying about the grass stains on our knees as we search for that exclusive four leaf clover.

Let’s laugh our hearts out in a water balloon fight, allowing ourselves to live life as a child, free of care & concern.

Eventually, I will have a plethora of hours and will while away the time by creating a pristine house.
But that season is not now.
And all the grandma’s in my life tell me that when that day comes, I’ll wish I had these begrudged hours back.

So embrace the moment you are in.

Embrace the messy. Embrace the sticky. Embrace the chaos.

Real living, real memory making is found in the messy, in the sticky, in the chaos.

{Hopefully coming later this week, The Dog Days of Summer 2: Experiencing joy in the midst of whining kids and emotional breakdowns}

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith, Family, Life Tagged With: #dogdaysofsummer, #summer2015

06-22-2015

Love Always Wins

And when we do not know what to pray for, as we ought,
the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.
Romans 8:28

There are times in life, so overwhelming with sorrow, that prayers can not be uttered.
You’re at a loss for words, with no answers for unimaginable acts of evil.

That’s been me for the past 5 days.

I can’t figure out how to pray because I am so stunned that in the year 2015, an American would desire to start a race war. Really? It’s easy to feel that we are back to square one when it comes to racism.

But more than that, there are 9 families, friends of those families, a church community who is in the throes of deep grief and anguish. And my heart just wants to give them a hug. Just wants them to know how loved they are. And just how sorry I am that someone with the same skin hue as myself did this to them. It makes me want to shout to the families of the 9 victims that the vile creature from Wednesday does not represent white people. That we love them and we stand with them, united together, to support them, honor them, and serve them.

And how the community of Charleston has responded in the past 5 days is mind boggling.

Source: Post & Courier

Church bells tolling united throughout the Lowcounty at 10am Sunday morning

A hands-held together unity chain with more than 10,000 people over the Cooper River Bridge

Hands held high in unison worshipping God at Mother Emanuel AME Church just days after the tragedy

Knees bowed low in unification in Charleston and across this country in prayer vigil after prayer vigil

As Martin Luther King, Jr. stated, “Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that”.

Love endures long.
Love bears up under anything and everything that comes.
Love never fails.
I Corinthians 13

To the black community, in Charleston and throughout this country, I love you and I am so deeply sorry for your loss.

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith, Life Tagged With: #charlestonstrong, #charlestonunited, #lovewins, #prayforcharleston

04-20-2015

Does God even care about the injustice in this world? Or does He just turn a blind eye to the wrongs in our lives?

The worn down wooden pew beckoned me as if it might shed light on the question that I just couldn’t shake.

The question wasn’t anything new, it was a dispute as old as time.
And I thought I had tread that question’s path well over the years.
Much like the well worn path a cow makes on his daily trek to drink water.

But yet, once again, it splintered into my life unbeckoned and this soul of mine would not rest.

God, if you really are real, if you really are all powerful, then why don’t you make the evil of this world go away?
God, if you really care, then why do you let people suffer? Why not answer their deepest yearnings?
God, if you say you love me, then why did you let me suffer years upon years of prayers unanswered?

You see, the Sunday before Lent began, ISIS beheaded 21 Egyptian Christians.
70 days later, as the beheadings continue, it still sickens my stomach.

How can such cruelty exist in this world, and it’s like He just turns a blind eye to it all?
At least it seems that way often enough for the seeds of doubting Him to be planted.

And as I ponder my own unanswered prayers, I began to feel the seeds of doubt take further hold of my soul.

So is it any wonder that during the lesson on Ash Wednesday…that when the pastor asks…

…if there is no one else there at the finish line but Him…no loved ones previously passed on…just Jesus…would it be enough?

And my honest answer was…I don’t really know Lord that you are enough. Because right now, you don’t seem very loving, seem very close, or seem to even care about the woes of this world.

For how could a God who cared let injustice happen in this world? Let injustice happen to those who praise His name?

So does any of this matter to Him? Does He ever show up to rescue His beloved?

You.
Tell.
Me.

Has He ever taken you from the broken down to the lifted up? Does He send a friend with a hug’s comfort right when needed most? What about that time on your knees in a hospital waiting room…did He not show up then with a kind word from a stranger?

So as I pondered the questions and doubts of my soul, I read His word with one question presiding over every page…
Show me who you are God.

Show me God that you are real. Show me that you care about humanity. Show me that our sufferings are not in vain.

As I make my way through Genesis and into Exodus it is uncanny, supernatural, what I read on these pages.
For how many times does He show me that he never leaves us, never forgets his promises, and always hears our hearts’ groanings.

When Joseph is sold into slavery, is lied against, is wronged time & time again…God uses it all for good.

When Pharaoh engulfed the lives of the Israelite in slavery, God heard their cries, saw their affliction, and most importantly….
He remembered HIS covenant to never leave them.
“Go in to Pharaoh…so that I may show you all the wonders of my hand…that you may know that I am the Lord” Exodus 10: 1&2

All of these stories teach me…

God doesn’t use injustice simply for unbelievers to know He is the Lord.
He also uses injustice to remind believers He is Lord.

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you.
{When life gets too hard and you feel the waters engulfing you, stay strong that the tide will not carry you away}
When you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.
{When the muck & mire of grief feel like a cow’s bellowing when writhed in labor pains…you will not be consumed by this tragedy}
For I am the LORD your God…and you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you. Isaiah 43: 2-4

Although the season of Lent may have passed over, I find myself in deep reflections and in even deeper readings.
Good can come from our doubts and our questions, when they delve us further into scripture.

So the reward of asking questions, of searching to know and understand Him better, is that He does show up.
Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne…and find grace to help in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16
He longs to shower you with grace, so approach Him, approach His word, approach Him in prayer… with confidence.

If you seek the face of the Lord, you will find His beauty.
He wants to answer your questions and He desires for you to know Him more fully.
He longs for you and He wants you to long for Him, as Lord of your life.

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith, Life Tagged With: Christianity, doubts, faith, isis, lent

01-29-2015

To the ones whose mind never stops racing, never stops analyzing

The months of 2014 wrap up into a bundle of cold days and frosty mornings. The dawning of a New Year on the horizon and I ask myself what will the word of 2015 be?

2014 was the first year I had given up resolutions… those pesky nuisances that dangle just out of reach, reminding ourselves that, yet again, we still have more work to complete, more self improvement to think about.

If 2014 was the year of “Say No” {And I had no idea saying no would be so freeing. Saying no meant saying yes to things that ARE my priority} then what would 2015 be the year of?

I lay on the bed, with piles of laundry beckoning and a dishwasher that delights itself in needing to be continually emptied, and my mind drifts to this friendship analyzation, that relationship analysis. My mind is constantly whirling, set on instant {and let’s be honest…a few days past as well} replay…what did he mean when he said that, what did she mean by that facial expression, maybe I should have explained my apology this way???

I’m transported back in time to May 2005…just hours before I walk down that aisle and pledge my life’s remaining balance to another human being. And what does that roommate, the one who knows your intricate self in only the way a roommate can…what does she remind me of?

STOP ANALYZING JESSICA.

It doesn’t get you anywhere and you’ve certainly tried.
It’s only 9:38am and my mind all ready feels tired from all the back & forth scenarios I play out.

And the frustrating part…The mind’s analysis is this treadmill that once you start, is pretty hard to jump off of.

The anlysis in our minds are like the strings flying that kite high in the windswept salty air. Keep the strings tight and the kite soars high. Loosen your hold and the kite tumbles down to a mess of strewn strings. Hold tight to the reins of your imagination and you soar. Loosen the strings and let your analysis take flight and you wonder how you will ever get the knotted strings unraveled.

So why is it, once you’ve declared loud, for all to hear, that 2015 will be the year of Be Still….
Be Still my mind. Be Still my analyzations. Just Be STILL.

…why is it when the decree is proclaimed, that then life unravels and you are left with a corded mess of a relationship that you can’t begin to unravel and you can’t help but analyze.

It’s all good and well to say Be Still when life is like an ice cream sundae. But when waters break months too early, when relationships are severed from a moment’s poor decision, when life’s lemonade is more like a bunch of sour lemons…that’s when it’s hardest to stop the running of that exhausting pace of your never be still mind.

But really, all those experiences you rehash, all those conversations you replay…they don’t make time stop.
They don’t change the score. They don’t get relived. Just relived in your mind.

And it’s exhausting. Mentally & Physically.
It saps your mental energy. It creates a run down human being.

So perhaps we give our analyzations to Him? Find the peace He promises in the scriptures of the Bible?

May the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way.
2 Thessalonians 3:16

Do not be anxious about anything…and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6 & 7

Because isn’t it much more mind boggling to trust that all of us…the has beens, worn-outs, and rejected…all of us can be in perfect peace, in stillness of mind…when we rely on Him to get it right. When it isn’t about our striving, our pleasing efforts. Because we all make mistakes and wish with all our might that our analysis could make time to go backwards and have the outcome be different.

So instead of having to figure it all out and get it exactly right, maybe we just keep waking up, writing down our list of gifts we’ve been blessed with, and try to be present in the moment. Live the life of intentional living. Knowing that even if we waste 17 precious hours today on our mind’s analysis, that He still loves us. That He still guides our lives. That He still wants to be in relationship with us.

And tomorrow I wake up, remind myself to let the mind rest, and Be Still in His peace.

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith, Life

12-01-2014

How to find Christ this December? And not run the race of frenzy?

Her, her with the aged worn glasses slipping down her nose, she bends achingly over that soft hewn piece of white pine. With her carving knife in hand, time slips away and something simple and beautiful is created from a formless blank slate.

My grandmother, Grandma Buckner as I called her, spent a lot of time carving wood. When you carve, you start with this piece of nothing special, non descript wood, and the end result is something to be admired and treasured.

So how does any of this have to do with the Christmas season? Is what I am about to write going to be worth a Nobel Peace Prize or be words you haven’t heard before?

NO.

But here’s the thing…the question of this and every Christmas season…how do we get to the 25th of December and not feel like we just ran a never ending race? When you wake on the 20th of December {that last Saturday before the big day} how do you not mutter the words “I just want it to be over with”?

This Christmas season, how do you stay focused on what really matters?

By carving time out of every single day.

Carving time that is filled solely with Him.

By creating space, moments, in your day where you commune with Him.
Time lapses where your sole focus is to re-nourish yourself.

For how can we have joy, hope, peace, and love if we aren’t filling ourselves up with
His Joy, His Peace, His Hope, His Love?

I know, I know…not rocket science. Nothing you haven’t heard before.

But what if this December, this Christmas season, you simply said STOP?

What if instead of running to the mall in those 25 unexpected free minutes, you ran to His word instead? Which leaves you sustained for when the kids come home and you’re suppose to be offering grace but it’s more often like a mutiny of words rushing unfettered out of your mouth?

When the gray skies dawn early and the warm sheets beckon you to snuggle in, what if instead you woke 32 minutes before your kids footsteps slumbered down the hall? Would you perhaps have a smile on your face when they rounded the corner because you had filled your heart with words of truth?

I know, I know…it’s hard in this world of ours to not feel the tug of “but this present has to be just right, so I need to spend more time, more money, more sanity…”

I personally get how hard it is to wake before the kids bound awake each. and. every. single. morning at 6:02am. I struggle with these same things and each December I get to the 23rd and wonder how I’m gonna make it the last 2 days. I put way too many demands on my time when instead I need to simply curl up with the Bible and read scripture.

For how can any time together {with family or with friends} be uplifting if I am worn out & spent?

So…what if I spent 30 minutes every day alone with Christ?

Reading scripture, pouring out the aches of this heart in my prayer journal, or delving into an advent devotional?

Would my December be a little less harried?

Would I get to Christmas day and have peace despite the chaos of family dynamics, be hopeful despite the circumstances I find myself in, be joyful that God wants to have a relationship with me and He is the one that did all the hard work that I could never accomplish myself?

And filled with His Joy, Peace, & Hope, would my heart, then, overflow with His love?

If I carve time out of my day for my Savior, would I not leave better than I came? Doesn’t he start with all of us as non descript pieces of wood and out of them sculpts us into these treasured images of Himself?

And if that doesn’t make you want to spend time with God, every single day, then what about this…

“And rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, he departed and went out to a desolate place, and there he prayed”. Mark 1:35

If Christ, who was all things Holy, needed one on one time with God the Father, then how much more do I myself need time with the Lord before I start my day?

So this December, join me?
Carve time, out of those precious 24 hours He gives every day, to find your sustainment in Him?

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith Tagged With: a hurried life, advent, Christmas, december, presents

11-06-2014

Alluminate your life

You walk into a room filled with hundreds {but it feels more like thousands} of women and you think…woa…what am I doing here? Let’s just turn around…I can hang out in my hotel room all weekend and be fine.

Cause you see, me, I’m not a big blogger…me….I only write a few times a month…once again, what am I doing here at this blogging conference with LOTS of big namers.

But then you experience the beauty of women, together, lifting their hands in a chorus of praise to the Lord.
You catch your breath and are reminded of just why you are here.

When I pondered going to Allume over the summer I wondered if I was crazy to spend such money on a blogging conference when I am just a sometimes blogger. Wouldn’t that money be better spent on the decaying window frame that needed replaced a few hundred days ago or on a relaxing weekend away with my husband?

But as I prayed about whether I should go to Allume, I kept hearing the word “Go”.
A constant whisper in my head when I sought His guidance on these plans I had signed myself up for. And I am so glad I did listen to His voice. Because…

It turned out to be such a growing experience, time spent delving closer to Christ, being renewed and inspired, and forming many new friendships. {The ladies I met were so welcoming, kind, and uplifting!}

While there I was so fortunate to attend a session by Lisa-Jo Baker about how us mom’s so often worry that motherhood means we are missing out on something. {And ya’ll, if I had only made it to this one session…the whole weekend would have been worth it. It was that incredible!}

Don’t we all question if there isn’t something bigger we are suppose to be doing with our time rather than just being a mom. So often I ask up the question…does what I do really matter to Christ?

But you know what Lisa-Jo said about that question…

I am NOT just a mom. Not just a sometimes blogger. If this world is God’s kingdom on earth then none of us are just something. For in God’s kingdom, every single moment & every single second is kingdom work. Whether that is washing dishes, folding clothes, inviting a college student over for a meal, or opening the door for a stranger. You see, there is nothing routine about your routine.

The time I spent at Allume lifted my spirits, encouraged me to keep writing, and reminded me that no matter how often I blog or how many times I drearily stick my hands into yet another sink load of dirty dishes…I am not just.

So I encourage you to find places where God can
encourage you, nourish you, and pour Himself INTO you.
You are that important and He delights Himself in you.

{Myself with Lindsay and Leigh}

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith, Life Tagged With: #allume, blogging conferences, faith, lisajobaker, women

10-30-2014

When your life is swirling and unfortunately it’s not goodness spewing from your lips…

The wind blows a midst the branches, leaves swirling, caught in the revolving dance of nature.

So goes our lives, being a mom, being a daughter, being a caregiver. Don’t we all have seasons when our lives are swirling around us, and there seems no end in sight?

When we have to literally makes ourselves stop. Make ourselves take a deep breath and simply BREATHE.

Last week, just hours prior to leaving town for a blogging conference, I screamed at my 4 year old daughter that “she had issues.”

Yes, unfortunately, you heard that right.

I screamed at a defenseless child…solely because she wouldn’t put a sweater over her head.

Whew…NOT my proudest moment! And to top it all off, the blogging conference…oh, it was a christian bloggers conference. Talk about really needing the grace of God…I certainly am not a Christian because I’ve got it all right.

It’s more like I get so much wrong and can do nothing good without Him.

All the pressures of the week, all the tugs and pulls to be this & that had left me depleted.

And unfortunately, my kids, my husband, my friends…they received my meager leftovers.

That moment was such a poignant reminder that without Christ, what do I truly accomplish?

If I am not filling myself, moment by moment with Christ, then what do my leftovers look like?

When your kid sweetly says “yes, ma’am” or takes their plate to the sink without asking…it’s easy in that moment to respond patiently with lots of gentleness. But when they contort their face to a snarl and stomp those little feet, when the bickering never ceases, and they quite intentionally slam that door in your face…

Those are the moments when it’s only Christ’s love that can respond in joy, in peace, in patience, in kindness.

Everyone has joy when their bundled little one smiles for the first time or the teetering child takes that first solid step… but when the 4am greeting is “Mama, I just threw up again” and you’re left stripping a bed for the 14th morning in a row…

That’s the moment you have to pray for the fruits of the spirit to be breathed out in you.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control… Galations 5:22 & 23

When I accomplish nothing on my own, is when God accomplishes the most for His glory.
When I am weakest, He is strongest.
When I admit that I’m not perfect, when I ask my child for forgiveness, when I delve into the messy chaotic past…

When I let go of trying to be perfect on my own. Of trying to act like I’ve got this parenting thing under control.

Only then, is God able to come alongside me, pick me up, and help me move forward.

So hopefully in that next future moment, when she stares defiantly at me that, “no, she isn’t putting on that red quilted sweater”…in that moment I say…”that is just fine.”

And when my child sees me truly repentant of my selfishness, when they experience firsthand me, mom, asking forgiveness for lashed out words…hopefully then, they see it’s okay to admit our flaws and imperfections.

So when my life swirls out of control, am I beckoning God to come close? Can I take at least one thing off my to-do list so that I can be more present and in the moment with my kids? Do I find moments every hour to remind myself of scripture, to ask God moment by moment to reside peacefully in me, so that others can experience joy, peace, patience from above and not the spewing of someone depleted from life.

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith, Family, Life Tagged With: christian parenting, fruits of the spirit, patience, servant heart, serving children

10-22-2014

How to stop beating yourself up…if only I had a way to make that happen

Sun rays shine through the broken window blinds, cascading micro dust particles throughout the air. But do I notice? Or am I too busy hurrying a child out the door? When my children look back on their life will the words, never softly spoken, “hurry up, we are late” be the echoes that resound in their heads?

And when I go to bed at night, do I ever allow myself to say “good job, Jessica” you made a difference in your child’s life today? Or do I tell myself yet again where I failed. Remind myself again of all the things I didn’t do. Beat myself up, yet again?

If you were to criticize your friends and your husband as much as you criticize yourself, you probably wouldn’t have friends or a husband. So if we are nice and encouraging to others, why don’t we apply the golden rule to how we treat ourselves?

Why is it, as women, we focus on all those should have beens, all those I didn’t do’s?

Whether you have 6 children or none. Whether you are a working in an office mama or a patience stretched to the max homebound mama, aren’t you doing your very best for your children?

At the end of the day we all stretch the elasticity of ourselves as thin as the thinnest pizza dough to make every sacrifice we can that will benefit our children.

We give our time, our money, our energy, our patience…every resource we have…if it will in some way make our children’s lives better. So why don’t we pat ourselves on the back? Call a time out?

Or even better, say game over?

Perhaps tonight when you sink into that worn mattress between sheets filled with sand and dirt smudges because you just didn’t have the heart to tell your child to stop jumping on the bed…what if in that moment you told yourself “Good Job”? Reminded yourself of all you DID do…
Today, I gave a hug. Today, I smiled at my child. Today, I bent down on one knee to look at that grubby frog in those muddy hands. Today, I overlooked the dirt in my son’s fingernails that will never go away as every single day he says so filled with childlife truth “I forgot I wasn’t suppose to use my hands as diggers”.

Wouldn’t it be so nice if I had a magic formula that would tell you how to make this happen? Drink this can of 10 calorie sugar water and you will be soooo nice to yourself. But you know what, I don’t have a magic fairy wand to wave and make myself be nicer to myself.

But I, and you, do have the ability to be intentional.

To ask God in prayer to help me be nicer to myself.

To acknowledge and let seep into your pores, into your hearts deepest darkest corner the resounding fact that God loves you just as you are. He delights in You! He sees you and He doesn’t see all your mistakes, all your should have done’s. He see’s you and He smiles exhuberantly thinking…How precious are you to me, my child!

Tonight when you lay your head down on your pillow, may you pray for God to help you see yourself through His lenses. A beautiful strong woman, an amazing ever giving mama, a compassionate wife…a child of the King.

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith, Family Tagged With: family, life, mom, women

10-06-2014

When you want to serve the multitude but Christ calls you to serve ‘just one’

How many whispers have been breathed in the exhale of shattered moments…God, take me to Uganda, take me to Guatemala, take me to the dumps, take me to the kids crying out in emotional refuge.

Take me anywhere God, anywhere but here.

Why is it so much easier to serve God in the limelight, in the excitement of international missions, in the homeless shelter, than to serve Him where He calls us to serve Him most?

In. Our. Homes.

Why is it easier for me to wash the feet of a crippled stranger than to kneel down, yet again, to tie the shoe of a straggling out the door late six year old. To control my tongue in a fit of rage and frustration when a disagreement with my husband is not going my way. To not give in to the old age saying of “I grew up this way, so I can’t change”.

It’s so much easier to whoop down and save the day, make the headlines through mission trips, organized church drives, and feeding the homeless. It’s so much harder to battle the trenches day in and day out. But what does Christ say matters most…

…Love each other in the same way I have loved you. John 15:12

To endlessly share HIS love with others. Not my version of love which contains an unfortunate amount of temper tantrums and ‘ughs’ erupted loudly. (And sadly, those aren’t expressions of my four year old…those are the expressions of this thirty six year old’s imperfections). HIS love doesn’t keep track of how many times you’ve washed that orange skillet, how many loads of clothes you’ve folded just this week alone, or how many meals your hands have crafted. HIS love doesn’t keep score. HIS love keeps giving, continues on amist the chaos that being in a family is guaranteed to bring.

It doesn’t matter how many Sunday School classes I’ve taught, how many Bible studies I attend, or if I never make it overseas to hug a smiling little Uganda boy.

What matters is that no matter where I am, I should exemplify CHARºIºTY: THE ACT OF GIVING.

I want to share HIS love on glorified battlefields but that isn’t where He is calling me. He’s calling me to remember what a wise teacher once said…charity begins at home.

It’s easier to minister to strangers because we have no emotional ties to them. When they reject God, we don’t take it personal. But when our own loved owns push God away, that is harder to watch. But maybe that’s what we need. Because then, it’s Christ’s peace that helps us respond in kindness. Whereas, if we only responded out of our imperfect selves, we probably wouldn’t be able to show as much gentleness or compassion as is needed. Or when a child says time after time how they don’t want to go to church, it’s Christ’s patience that shines through to help provide an encouraging and uplifting response.

Perhaps God changes us more, grows our faith more, when we allow HIM to place us where He wants us to serve.

“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts.” says the LORD. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine” Isaiah 55:8

So…whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. I Corinthians 10:31

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith, Life Tagged With: anglican, Christianity, faith, missions, religion

07-01-2014

A Wake Up Call

I’m highly embarrassed to admit but…five years ago, I sat on a berber carpeted floor discussing vacation bible school with other church volunteers and I said…well what really matters most are the snacks!

And last year…vacation bible school was about the break i’d get from my 2 kids because finally, finally my youngest could attend.

SERIOUSLY???

So it was a big wake up call when a cousin of mine posted recently on facebook that his church had 61 kids attend the past week of vbs and most importantly…1 child accepted Christ as his Savior.

Made me think, what in the h*** is wrong with me? That VBS is this thing about animal crackers or getting a break from your kids? That isn’t it, Jessica.

It’s about winning kids to Christ. It’s imparting scripture in a 6 year old so that when he gets home and mom & dad don’t get along, he reads Psalms 56: 3-4 and says a prayer to God to keep him safe and calm. It’s teaching a 9 year old that honoring Christ is being kind to that kid on the playground who doesn’t have anyone to play with.

VBS is, can be, and should be…So MUCH MORE than free baby sitting. That 1 kid that chose to believe in Christ, to have faith in God…THAT, that’s what it’s about.

Sometimes I forget that kids can grasp way more than we think they can. I think they are too young to read them scripture straight from the Word or to explain what it means to be a Christian. Sure, they’ll ask questions I don’t always know the answer to. But they will probably actually have the faith that Christ was seeking as He said, “Let the little children come to me…for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.” It’s me, with my super charged adult analysis, that has a hard time grasping the concept of faith. Not the kid who says “I do believe in Christ and want HIM as my Lord, as who I follow.”

Hmmm…not even sure how to close this post…but I’m thankful, so thankful, for this realization. How often do I see Sunday school, vbs, or child care during a Bible study as just that… just child care. But it’s not just that.

“And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed, and when you are getting up.” Deut. 6: 6-7

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Filed Under: Confessions, Faith Tagged With: Christ, Christianity, church, disciples, faith, God, salvation

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