01-23-2017

The #1 Lie Christians Say: God Doesn’t Give You More Than You Can Handle

I’m not a theologian. Never been to seminary. Just a girl who wants to have a deeper understanding of scripture.

When faced with grief, hard times, and just plain life – there’s one phrase shared in the Christian community that I detest.

“God won’t ever give you more than you can handle.”

I’m sure people mean well – not sure what to say when a friend is in the throes of seemingly insurmountable hardships.

But that phrase is actually not in scripture.

Yes, I Corinthians 10:13 does say God won’t let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. However, it doesn’t say hardship. It says temptation. And in my opinion, the word temptation means temptation to sin.

Without ill intent, we alter scripture to make it seem like God doesn’t allow hardship we can’t endure.

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Bible stories resound with God letting people experience tragedy, deprivation, poverty…the list goes on & on. Story after story it is HE who prevails them through the storms of life. Biblical stories actually don’t end well when people choose their own devices to make it through the hardships.

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If God didn’t give you more than you could handle on your own, why would you ever need Him?

We realize our dependence on Him when we have nothing left of our own resources to make it through the next moment.

It is not of my own striving, my own accord, my own will that has helped me through the mountains of life.
When I realize my brain, my body, my heart cannot adequately meet the need in front of me is when I turn to Christ the most.

It’s as small as realizing I can’t go a day without yelling at my kids without the Holy Spirit giving me self-control of my mouth.

It’s as big as realizing I can’t forgive heart wounds from trauma without the supernatural gift of forgiveness from Christ.

Part of Christianity is accepting the limitations of my own self. Of being willing to say I wasn’t meant to walk life’s journey alone.

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It is when I lean most heavily on Him that I thrive.
I’m not talking about thriving in the material sense of the word.
I’m talking about thriving in joy, peace, self control, contentedness.

As we are reminded in II Corinthians 12:9 –

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.

In my translation…

Christ’s grace is sufficient for you, for His power is made perfect in your weakness. 

When friends are facing hard times, instead of saying “God won’t give you more than you can handle”, we could instead encourage them that Christ will be the provider of what gets them through the journey.

jessica

 

 

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04-20-2015

Does God even care about the injustice in this world? Or does He just turn a blind eye to the wrongs in our lives?

The worn down wooden pew beckoned me as if it might shed light on the question that I just couldn’t shake.
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The question wasn’t anything new, it was a dispute as old as time.
And I thought I had tread that question’s path well over the years.
Much like the well worn path a cow makes on his daily trek to drink water.
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But yet, once again, it splintered into my life unbeckoned and this soul of mine would not rest.

God, if you really are real, if you really are all powerful, then why don’t you make the evil of this world go away?
God, if you really care, then why do you let people suffer? Why not answer their deepest yearnings?
God, if you say you love me, then why did you let me suffer years upon years of prayers unanswered?

You see, the Sunday before Lent began, ISIS beheaded 21 Egyptian Christians.
70 days later, as the beheadings continue, it still sickens my stomach.

How can such cruelty exist in this world, and it’s like He just turns a blind eye to it all?
At least it seems that way often enough for the seeds of doubting Him to be planted.

And as I ponder my own unanswered prayers, I began to feel the seeds of doubt take further hold of my soul.

So is it any wonder that during the lesson on Ash Wednesday…that when the pastor asks…

…if there is no one else there at the finish line but Him…no loved ones previously passed on…just Jesus…would it be enough?

And my honest answer was…I don’t really know Lord that you are enough. Because right now, you don’t seem very loving, seem very close, or seem to even care about the woes of this world.

For how could a God who cared let injustice happen in this world? Let injustice happen to those who praise His name?

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So does any of this matter to Him? Does He ever show up to rescue His beloved?

You.
Tell.
Me.

Has He ever taken you from the broken down to the lifted up? Does He send a friend with a hug’s comfort right when needed most? What about that time on your knees in a hospital waiting room…did He not show up then with a kind word from a stranger?

So as I pondered the questions and doubts of my soul, I read His word with one question presiding over every page…
Show me who you are God.

Show me God that you are real. Show me that you care about humanity. Show me that our sufferings are not in vain.

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As I make my way through Genesis and into Exodus it is uncanny, supernatural, what I read on these pages.
For how many times does He show me that he never leaves us, never forgets his promises, and always hears our hearts’ groanings.

When Joseph is sold into slavery, is lied against, is wronged time & time again…God uses it all for good.

When Pharaoh engulfed the lives of the Israelite in slavery, God heard their cries, saw their affliction, and most importantly….
He remembered HIS covenant to never leave them.
“Go in to Pharaoh…so that I may show you all the wonders of my hand…that you may know that I am the Lord”  Exodus 10: 1&2

All of these stories teach me…

God doesn’t use injustice simply for unbelievers to know He is the Lord.
He also uses injustice to remind believers He is Lord.

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 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you.
{When life gets too hard and you feel the waters engulfing you, stay strong that the tide will not carry you away}
When you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.
{When the muck & mire of grief feel like a cow’s bellowing when writhed in labor pains…you will not be consumed by this tragedy}
For I am the LORD your God…and you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you.  Isaiah 43: 2-4

Although the season of Lent may have passed over, I find myself in deep reflections and in even deeper readings.
Good can come from our doubts and our questions, when they delve us further into scripture.

So the reward of asking questions, of searching to know and understand Him better, is that He does show up.
Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne…and find grace to help in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16
He longs to shower you with grace, so approach Him, approach His word, approach Him in prayer… with confidence.

If you seek the face of the Lord, you will find His beauty.
He wants to answer your questions and He desires for you to know Him more fully.
He longs for you and He wants you to long for Him, as Lord of your life.

jessica

 

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10-06-2014

When you want to serve the multitude but Christ calls you to serve ‘just one’

How many whispers have been breathed in the exhale of shattered moments…God, take me to Uganda, take me to Guatemala, take me to the dumps, take me to the kids crying out in emotional refuge.

Take me anywhere God, anywhere but here.

Why is it so much easier to serve God in the limelight, in the excitement of international missions, in the homeless shelter, than to serve Him where He calls us to serve Him most?

In. Our. Homes.

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Why is it easier for me to wash the feet of a crippled stranger than to kneel down, yet again, to tie the shoe of a straggling out the door late six year old. To control my tongue in a fit of rage and frustration when a disagreement with my husband is not going my way. To not give in to the old age saying of “I grew up this way, so I can’t change”.

It’s so much easier to whoop down and save the day, make the headlines through mission trips, organized church drives, and feeding the homeless. It’s so much harder to battle the trenches day in and day out. But what does Christ say matters most…

…Love each other in the same way I have loved you. John 15:12

To endlessly share HIS love with others. Not my version of love which contains an unfortunate amount of temper tantrums and ‘ughs’ erupted loudly. (And sadly, those aren’t expressions of my four year old…those are the expressions of this thirty six year old’s imperfections). HIS love doesn’t keep track of how many times you’ve washed that orange skillet, how many loads of clothes you’ve folded just this week alone, or how many meals your hands have crafted. HIS love doesn’t keep score. HIS love keeps giving, continues on amist the chaos that being in a family is guaranteed to bring.

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It doesn’t matter how many Sunday School classes I’ve taught, how many Bible studies I attend, or if I never make it overseas to hug a smiling little Uganda boy.

What matters is that no matter where I am, I should exemplify CHARºIºTY: THE ACT OF GIVING.

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I want to share HIS love on glorified battlefields but that isn’t where He is calling me. He’s calling me to remember what a wise teacher once said…charity begins at home.

It’s easier to minister to strangers because we have no emotional ties to them. When they reject God, we don’t take it personal. But when our own loved owns push God away, that is harder to watch. But maybe that’s what we need. Because then, it’s Christ’s peace that helps us respond in kindness. Whereas, if we only responded out of our imperfect selves, we probably wouldn’t be able to show as much gentleness or compassion as is needed.  Or when a child says time after time how they don’t want to go to church, it’s Christ’s patience that shines through to help provide an encouraging and uplifting response.

Perhaps God changes us more, grows our faith more, when we allow HIM to place us where He wants us to serve.

“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts.” says the LORD. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine” Isaiah 55:8

 So…whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. I Corinthians 10:31

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07-01-2014

A Wake Up Call

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I’m highly embarrassed to admit but…five years ago, I sat on a berber carpeted floor discussing vacation bible school with other church volunteers and I said…well what really matters most are the snacks!

And last year…vacation bible school was about the break i’d get from my 2 kids because finally, finally my youngest could attend.

SERIOUSLY???

So it was a big wake up call when a cousin of mine posted recently on facebook that his church had 61 kids attend the past week of vbs and most importantly…1 child accepted Christ as his Savior.

Made me think, what in the h*** is wrong with me? That VBS is this thing about animal crackers or getting a break from your kids? That isn’t it, Jessica.

It’s about winning kids to Christ. It’s imparting scripture in a 6 year old so that when he gets home and mom & dad don’t get along, he reads Psalms 56: 3-4 and says a prayer to God to keep him safe and calm. It’s teaching a 9 year old that honoring Christ is being kind to that kid on the playground who doesn’t have anyone to play with.

VBS is, can be, and should be…So MUCH MORE than free baby sitting. That 1 kid that chose to believe in Christ, to have faith in God…THAT, that’s what it’s about.

Sometimes I forget that kids can grasp way more than we think they can. I think they are too young to read them scripture straight from the Word or to explain what it means to be a Christian. Sure, they’ll ask questions I don’t always know the answer to. But they will probably actually have the faith that Christ was seeking as He said, “Let the little children come to me…for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.” It’s me, with my super charged adult analysis, that has a hard time grasping the concept of faith. Not the kid who says “I do believe in Christ and want HIM as my Lord, as who I follow.”

Hmmm…not even sure how to close this post…but I’m thankful, so thankful, for this realization. How often do I see Sunday school, vbs, or child care during a Bible study as just that… just child care. But it’s not just that.

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“And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed, and when you are getting up.” Deut. 6: 6-7

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03-18-2014

Life ~ A Fleeting Glance

Metastatic Cancer, Stage 4, Inoperable…words you pray you never hear spoken. Words that shatter your world. Words that make you ponder just how much more He, God, will allow you to suffer? Wasn’t the Thursday evening phone call 3 years ago at 5:23 pm bad enough? Shouldn’t that be the worst your family has to muddle through?

That night we lost a brother…a best friend…a son, to suicide. The grief, the despair, the depression, the helplessness….it’s intangible. But moment by moment, day by day, you pick up the pieces until time passes and as the years tick by you find that the strongholds of grief are losing their grips.

And then, you receive the phone call that your mother in law has cancer. And it doesn’t look good.

You question God, you rail against Him in anger, you seek answers… You drop to your knees and slowly the faith that has kept you afloat your whole life, reminds you…

“Be careful, keep calm and don’t be afraid. If you do not stand firm in your faith, you will not stand at all.” Isaiah 7:4 & 9

“… the God we serve is able to save us from it.. But even if he does not, …we will not serve your gods…(He is still good.)” Daniel 3:17

“Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food…
YET, (even then) I will rejoice in the Lord
I will be joyful in God my Savior.
The Sovereign Lord is my strength” Habakkuk 3:17-19

All I want is order in my life and after 3 years of chaos, life was finally beginning to be somewhat normal.  So now, I feel like we are starting back all over again…on the brink of another life storm.

So what’s a girl to do? GIVE IT (my worries, my desire for control, my helplessness) TO GOD. Which is SO much easier said than done.

The book of Psalms has been a constant companion throughout my life and I’ve long believed that there is nothing wrong with asking God “WHY” and bemoaning the situation in our lives, if we first…give Him praise.

So, here’s my list of praises to HIM…

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~My MIL is staying positive & my children are able to spend quality time with her
~He has provided us with so many supportive family & friends
~No matter what happens in the weeks to come, He is a constant source of strength

And so, as we live out this storm in our lives, I am reminded of how crucial faith is to it all. Faith isn’t having all the answers, faith isn’t believing that everything will simply be all hunkey dorey…faith is having hope that there is a God, that there is a heaven, that He never leaves us, and that nothing separates us from Him.

“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39

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11-12-2012

Jars of Clay

For the past ten weeks I have been attending a Bible study led by Joanne Ellison from Drawing Near to God ministries. The following thought process was inspired from a recent lesson. This isn’t a light & fluffy post. I hope it touches each of your hearts, because none of us are without suffering through loss and heartache in this life.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. II Corinthians 4:7-9

Why do bad things happen to good people? What about all the loss, suffering, and tragedy that seem to be the norm for so many? Why why why, we constantly ask. And how are we suppose to continue to live in the midst of all the despair that tragedy can so easily bring.

We wonder why God has forgotten us, why He has not answered our prayers in the way we want them answered. But what if, there were ten times, a hundred times, more worse stuff that could happen to us, that never does because God does intervene. I could be completely wrong here. I really have no idea why He allows the bad stuff to happen. But consider this…

As Christians, we are (or should be) like jars of clay, molded and sculpted by Him to be who He wants us to be. And in our innermost being….that is where He, God, dwells in us. We are now the tabernacle, the tent of the Old, which houses not only His presence but His light.

And to be the jar that shines His light, we need cracks to fully showcase that light. For, unless there are cracks in a closed jar, the light only shines dimly. Perhaps that is why God allows some of those bad things happen to us…

For if  you are a fully formed jar of clay, the best way to see the flame deep inside you is through cracks in your hardened exterior. But the only way to get those cracks is to be broken, going through difficult and trying times. Because when we are broken, that is when His light shines the brightest through us.

My husband’s brother committed suicide 2 years ago. At first, the loss seemed insurmountable. There are moments, it still does. But I believe that the only reason we are moving through, moving past, is from the presence of God in our lives. Not that we haven’t been mad and angry with Him. Not that we haven’t wanted to wash our hands of Him. But it’s His peace that brings us sleep on a restless night, His grace that prompts uplifting words from strangers – in the moment they are needed most, and it’s His abounding love that encourages us to ask the hard questions and finally settle on believing through faith, not through understanding.

His light that shines through us from this brokenness hopefully encourages others who go through tragedy themselves. It shines bright so that hurting people can find the hope that is desperately needed to continue to live with joy, happiness, and excitement for all life brings.

Its not easy, after going through tragedy, to look forward to what tomorrow brings. Trust me, I know that wholeheartedly. But its an encouragement to look at others who have spent plenty of time in the trenches but still find joy in the future.

~ Jessica

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03-25-2012

Ann Voskamp, Part I

Wow, what a weekend I’ve had. So emotionally wrent, so uplifting and recharging, so much to give thanks to God for, and so much to think about. Lucky & Blessed… me and about 1000 other women who were able to hear Ann Voskamp this weekend at a local church’s women’s retreat. If you aren’t familiar with Ann’s work, check out One Thousand Gifts….

Once again, Wow. That is about all I can say. On one hand, I feel so emotionally exhausted and on the other, I feel like I can’t stop from smiling and picking up my pen to write my gratitude list. As I sit in Starbuck’s right now, I’m sure I could be getting quite a few curious stares…I’ve got a smile plastered to my face and keep seeing all these moments right in front of me to be thankful for….the teenage girl laughing as she runs through the pouring rain, the mother & daughter sharing small talk over chocolatey drinks…and all I want to do is shout and say…you are all beautiful and God loves you so much!!! Think they’d let me back in Starbucks if I did that???? Probably not….so I simply hope my smile will shine on those around me and hope they know how much God really does love them.

So you’re probably wondering what type of women’s retreat this really was…so to start off, I’ll try to give a brief description of Ann’s book and how much it has impacted my life…

Ann’s goal is to impart on people how to live their life full – with all the joy capable of receiving from God. The most amazing part of the book is that its not like Ann has had this easy life, with everything going her way, and she simply walks on untested faith and skips along merrily in the clouds. Rather, this most miraculous lady who so generously allows God to use her and her life experiences…has been through hell & back. She’s lost those dearest to her, suffered from numerous trials, and yet, she has found a way to rise above and to let her life exemplify what she believes. And along the way, she asks the tough questions…and most importantly, gives thanks to God. For as she said this weekend…When I am thankful for His gifts, it is as if my afflictions are eclipsed by the glory of God….

So what have I taken away from all this??? Quite a lot. The need, the importance, of getting back to chronicling my own daily gifts from God and slowly proclaiming to the world how God has helped me in the midst of the trials I’ve been through in my life.

So I’ll start with my list of thankfulness…

#1. Those girlfriends that inspire me in my Christian journey, those that pray with and for me, those I can have really deep conversations with about the Bible and what it means to me and them…the women that sat by my side during the weekend and lifted their voices in praise to God…so thankful for women like that in my life.

#2. And I’m just as thankful for those girlfriends who share a different faith or hold different beliefs…these women keep me grounded, remind me of how special we all are in God’s eyes…no matter what you believe God to look or be like. These women stretch me, make me ask tough questions, and really think about what truly matters at the end of the day.

#3.

#4. The joy in that little girl’s eyes as she looks at the sand like its ice cream and tries to cram as much of it as possible into her mouth, all at once

#5.

#6. The sweet sounds filtering through my ears….you are never as thankful for the senses until you lose one

#7. Raindrops on a tin roof

#8. The opportunity to teach children about our need to share God’s love with others

#9. For bringing me through the rain, through the valley, up the mountain…just so I could be thankful for seeing all the beauty from the mountaintop

#10. Being able to look down from the mountain and see everything you’ve been through and knowing you’ve made it through…all thanks to God’s grace

Thanks for letting me share the journey of this weekend with you. There will be more, much more, to come as I reflect…

May God bless you, right where you are, and show you the cherish-able moments all around you.

Love,

Jessica

“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” I Thessalonians 5:18

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